On Planning – Or Letting Someone Else Plan

I knew he was planning to join me in Quebec City in August, so I felt bad that I had yet to find a place, or even settle on dates.  “Why don’t you ask him to plan the trip?” asked my mother.  I had my reasons, but at this point it was time to let them go.  So I picked some dates and left him a message: These are the dates I’m thinking.  Let me know if they work for you.  And I’m having trouble finding just the right place, so that’s why I haven’t called you about this in a while.

He IM’d me a few hours later.  The dates worked for him.  I then explained my trouble finding a place to stay that met my criteria.  I want a place where I can cook.  I want to be able to go to the local farm market, bring home my wares and cook up something for myself.

Now I must explain that this is the guy who has sent me a few links in the past couple months with things to do up there and places to stay.  So I write “This is the part where you look on Google for three seconds and come up with the perfect place.”  And a few seconds later, there’s a link.  “Try this,” he says.  It looks like a house you’d find in suburban America, so I tell him I forgot to mention my other criterion: I also want someplace right in the old part of the city – or very close to it.

In no time flat, he sends another link.  And it’s perfect.  Someone’s apartment, beautifully appointed, a short walk from the old part of town.  “All your requirements and affordable,” he writes.  “And you’ll contact the owners to find out if it’s free?” I ask.  “I’d be delighted,” he writes.  Delighted.  That’s right.  Not just “sure,” but “delighted.”

Then I get a little nervous and say, “Wait – how long are you planning on coming?”  Because I was thinking I wanted some alone time to explore, but I don’t tell him this.  He responds with, “Whatever you’d prefer.”  That he would love to come the whole time, “but if you’re looking for some alone time, that’s cool, too.”  This is the point where you’re going to wonder why I don’t marry this man.  You would not be the first person to ask me this question – by a long shot.  But that’s nothing I’m going to get into here.

Here’s the thing: because the life I choose to lead requires a bit of planning, people think I like to plan.  They would be wrong.  I plan because I’m all I’ve got – if I don’t do it, it doesn’t get done.  But there is nothing more I would love than for someone else to say, “I’m thinking of going here on these dates – are you free?”  And then they take the reins and plan the trip.  All I have to do is show up.

And that’s the very reason this trip is going to happen.  I admitted my frustration and put out there the idea of someone else taking over part of the planning.  And it worked!  So now let’s just hope this little apartment is free on the dates we want to do….though if it’s not, I’m sure he’ll have no trouble finding another:)

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