We are a society that likes to hold on to things: the clothes that no longer fit, the kitchen gadget never used, the man we just know isn’t right for us.
“I should just let it go,” I said to my mother the other day. Except I wasn’t talking about clothes or gadgets or men. I was talking about my attempts to reconnect with my Catholic roots. Don’t get me wrong – God and I have a nice little friendship going. And have for quite some time. That’s not going anywhere. And I am always renewed at the yearly retreat I attend and inspired by my sessions with my spiritual director. None of that will go away either. But when people ask what religion I am, I haven’t said “Catholic” in a long time. My response is, “Well…I grew up Catholic.” Because I no longer consider myself one. I get the feeling the Catholic church doesn’t want people like me. People that question things. People that like new ideas. People that don’t want to be judged by their stance on gay marriage or by their attendance at and contributions to a church.
I’ve left jobs when the management and I no longer agree. And so it is with the church. The management and I no longer agree. The management here on earth, I should say.
And I thought I’d have a lot to say on this, a lot of explaining to do. But as I sit here, I find it’s simple really. It had its time and place in my life. I’ve struggled a long time to hold on to it, and now it’s just time to let it go.